What the fuck?
Green Lantern’s ring is the most powerful weapon in the DC Universe, capable of doing anything its wearer can imagine and will into being.
I had no idea it could also transform the wearer into an envelope.
….
AN ENVELOPE.
THAT PUNCHES PEOPLE.
I just can’t.
WHAT?!?!
OK, so I know a lot of these have been from Silver Age Superman, but I make no apologies, because here we see that Superman has developed a new power:
HE CAN CREATE A TINY VERSION OF HIMSELF THAT HE SHOOTS FROM HIS HANDS.
……
……….
WHAT THE FUCK?!?!
And…. wait…. do you see that building in the background? I think the text on it is supposed to be a news ticker, like they used to have in Times Square, but it looks like it’s just on the building… wouldn’t it be amazing if it was like the name of the company?
“Giant Guided Missile Plummeting Towards Eiffel Tower Cupcakes, Inc”
I love how it’s a ‘giant’ guided missile. And why is it plummeting? If it’s a missile it shouldn’t plummet, especially if it’s guided…
Aunt May vs – GALACTUS!?
Let that sink in for a little bit while I go home and rethink my life…
What in the fuck?
I love Lois reaction:
“Oh no… NO! You’ve become a BEAST!”
I also love how he is more worried about her going to a play (a PLAY!?!) with him than the fact that he’s turned into a goddamn lion, but hey, who am I to judge?
And what is Jimmy doing? Oh, I’m sorry, Jim, is the fact that I’ve turned into a FUCKING LION boring you?!?! Here, give me your signal watch. I’m going to beat you to death with it.
The Age of Apocalypse
Took Place In: Age of Apocalypse Alpha, Omega, Amazing X-Men 1-4, Astonishing X-Men 1-4, X-Calibre 1-4, Weapon X 1-4, Gambit & the X-Ternals 1-4, Factor X 1-4, X-Man 1-4, X-Universe 1-2, Generation Next 1-4
Written By: Scott Lobdell (Alpha, Omega, Astonishing X-Men, Generation Next), Mark Waid (Alpha, Omega), Fabian Nicieza (Amazing X-Men, Gambit and the X-Ternals), Larry Hama (Weapon X), John Francis Moore (Factor X), Warren Ellis (X-Calibre), Jeph Loeb (X-Man)
Art By: Andy Kubert (Amazing X-Men), Roger Cruz (Alpha, Omega), Steve Epting (Alpha, Factor X), Joe Madureira (Astonishing X-Men), Dan Green (Weapon X), Adam Kubert (Weapon X), Karl Kessel (Weapon X), Ken Lashley (X-Calibre), Tony Daniel (Gambit and the X-Ternals), Steve Skroce (X-Man), Chris Bachalo (Generation Next)
Characters Involved: Magneto, Rogue, Quicksilver, Storm, Exodus, Banshee, Iceman, Morph, Sabretooth, Wild Child, Sunfire, Dazzler, Nightcrawler (X-Men), Colossus, Shadowcat, Husk, Chamber, Vincente, Skin, Mondo (Generation Next), Gambit, Sunspot, Lila Cheney, Jubilee, Strong Guy (X-Ternals), Cyclops, Havok, Beast, Cannonball, Bedlam Brothers (Factor X), Forge, X-Man, Sauron, Toad, Mastermind (X-Man), Sinister, Holocaust, Abyss, Mikhail Rasputin (Horsemen), Apocalypse
Story: Hoo boy. I briefly touched on this huge story here, but let’s get into more detail. When Marvel announced that they were cancelling every book in the X-Men line, fans went apeshit. And when they announced they were relaunching them with all new #1 issues, retailers went apeshit (in a good way). Fans were backlashing something fierce, but then this trickle of teases came out, including a book that showed all of the new character designs, and all of a sudden people weren’t upset. In fact, they were really, really excited.
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you: Batman Jones.
As a baby, he was saved by Batman, so his parents named him… Batman. Way to go, Mr. and Mrs. Jones.
So this doofy kid grew up introducing himself as “Batman Jones”, and when he got older he decided he wanted to be a crime fighter, just like his namesake.
Hahaha what in the fuck?
I wish- SO BADLY- that like Grant Morrison had brought him back and treated it seriously. He would have been horribly murdered like immediately.
In part 1 I covered the horribly underrated Avengers run by Geoff Johns, and in part 2 I covered Ed Brubaker’s fantastic run on Daredevil.
Today I am going to briefly go over a run that really went under the radar, and it’s too bad because it was awesome, and that’s Rick Remender’s Venom.
Flash Thompson: Venom
While he gained popularity with runs on books like Uncanny X-Force (so good), Secret Avengers (soo good), and more recently Uncanny Avengers (sooooo good), Remender really got my attention with Venom.
Starting in the 90’s, Venom’s popularity rivaled even Spider-Man’s. So Marvel took him from being a scary ass villain and made him a watered down anti-hero. It sold a lot of books, but it took the character’s direction away from him for years and years. Then Mark Millar gave the Venom symbiote to Mac Gargan, the former Scorpion, in his awesome “Marvel Knights Spider-Man” (which I need to go over one day soon). This was a nice change, and it looked like the character was going to be revitalized, but then he got stuck as a bit player in Warren Ellis’ Thunderbolts and Brian Bendis’ Dark Avengers, and nothing of note was ever really done with him.
We did it! We made it! I was worried for a second…
In Part One – we covered Batman ’66, Batman ’89, and Tim Burton’s Batman Returns…
Then in Part Two – we tore apart Joel Schumacher’s Batman Forever and the god awful Batman and Robin…
Now it’s time to review Christopher Nolan’s Dark Knight Trilogy!
Batman Begins (2005)
Directed By: Christopher Nolan
Starring: Christian Bale (Batman), Liam Neeson (Ra’s Al Ghul), Cillian Murphy (Scarecrow), Ken Watanabe (fake Ra’s), Katie Holmes (Rachel Dawes), Michael Caine (Alfred), Morgan Freeman (Lucius Fox), Gary Oldman (Jim Gordon), Tom Wilkinson (Carmine Falcone), Rutger Hauer (Mr. Earle)
Batmobile:
Plot: A true origin story following Bruce’s life periodically from the murder of his parents to his travels around the world making himself into Batman, one step at a time. He becomes a member of, and eventually turns against, the League of Shadows, who come to Gotham to get their revenge and destroy the city. As Batman, he must face the Falcone mafia, the Scarecrow, and Ra’s Al Ghul, while trying to rekindle his relationship with childhood friend turned assistant district attorney Rachel Dawes, establishing a relationship with Jim Gordon (one of the only honest cops in Gotham), and working to get his company back from Mr. Earle.
Last time, in Part One: we covered Batman ’66, Batman ’89, and Batman Returns, now for our descent into Hell…
Batman Forever (1995)
Directed By: Joel Schumacher
Starring: Val Kilmer (Batman), Chris O’Donnell (Robin), Jim Carrey (Riddler), Tommy Lee Jones (Two-Face), Nicole Kidman (Dr. Chase Meridian), Michael Gough (Alfred)
Batmobile:
Plot: Batman and his new sidekick Robin must face the combined forces of Two-Face (former district attorney Harvey Dent, who blames Batman for the courtroom incident that scarred his face) and the Riddler (Edward Nygma, a former employee of Bruce Wayne seeking revenge for being justifiably fired), and their device that is going to steal all of the information from all of the brains in Gotham. Or some stupid crap.
Comic Zombie 